Advertise With Us

Friday, July 1, 2011

Accidental Local


Yeah.

Ok, I started off not have a great day, just personally. You know when you wake up and everything is "off"? I felt down on myself, I'm sick of having migraines half the time, it's hot outside, I feel overwhelmed with even bigger fish in my life...oh I have a list, but I shall not bore you.

After working, I packaged up soap and dropped it off at the shipping place. On my way home, I ran over a huge piece of metal and I heard air pissing out of my rear left tire, but made it home well before it was flat. Before I entered the house, something smelled funny. I think with all the rain, the empty plant pots and cat bowl have filled up with water and things are swimming in them. Probably larvae ready to sprout wings and legs. Whatever it is, it smelled disgusting. I walk over through the mulchy-dirt, dumped out all the filled containers and brought the ones I could clean inside to wash.

As I was cleaning them in the sink the stench got even worse. You should have seen my face. Probably looked like I had tried to suck a lemon. RANK, stank, bleck. I cleaned the containers, but the smell didn't go away, so I dumped in a pint of bleach water that I usually have handy.

No change.

I got the 409 cleaning stuff. I cleaned the sink, the disposal, the counters, I started the dishwasher, thinking maybe there was something horribly stinky in there ... Hmmmph. Nothing. The place still smelled like something was rotting. I took the garbage out.

Nothing.

When I came in, I noticed some dirt on the floor and I picked it up with a paper towel, suspiciously... and brought it up to my nose very s-l-o-w-l-y. I felt as if I'd been slapped. What in the hell?

Must be poop. Rotten poop!? I looked under my shoes. First shoe. Nothing. Second shoe: Yup, I stepped in poo. Icky icky poo. I took my shoe off, cleaned it with a plastic fork (disposable, obviously) and set my wet, clean shoe aside. House still smelled like crap. I noticed I had left a nice trail of pancake-sized poo stamp marks everywhere as I searched for the stench that was making me gag.



I spent the rest of the afternoon on the floor with my cleaning spray and paper towels cleaning poo stamps.

And I still think I smell poo.

So that was my day.

How was yours?


7 comments:

The Morbid The Merrier said...

Mine was about the same, sadly. :-(

Artisan Soaps said...

I'm sorry to hear that but dang can you paint a picture with words - I feel like I 'watched' that whole thing play out with increasingly building suspense!

I hate to say it but mine's been pretty cruisy ..

Briny Bar Soap said...

poo stamps.

Amy Warden said...

Ironically, I have done this very thing. Not recently, but I have done it. It's just crappy.

Hope you have better days ahead!!

Postpanamamaxi said...

My four-year-old son today crashed his grandma's birthday party by carrying chicken poo into the house.

And even after cleaning the mess I always had the impression that it was still smelly.

And I remember some years ago, I had a kitten named Luzie (should have named her Lucifer), who creeped behind my kitchen sink unit and dishwasher and defecated there.
It took three days until I found where the cat poo smell was coming from. She made three huge piles of dump behind the sink unit.
I was pregnant in the 8th month when this happened and had to climb through my sink unit to clean up this mess.

Afterwards I could not stop hallucinating cat poo smell everywhere in my house.
Nasty cat!

Zwerg said...

I just come back from a three day Market and feel like poo...
but happy..
regards
andrea

Body Luminosity said...

Ah well. Some days it's the shoe, some days it's the poo. Hope tomorrow is better.